You talking to me? You talking to me? You must be talking to me because Travis has gone out for bullets and C4.
I was about to write a post in which the Teamsters and the National Association for the Advanced of Colored People blast Egypt for a cover-up and racism over the recent discovery that the pyramids were not built by slaves as generally believed for at least as long as I can remember, which is generally 4-5 times as long as most citizens in the NOMF™ and 10 times as long as the average American voter.
This post would be in the style I perfected a couple of decades ago in which I took an actual bit of economic, religious, social, or poopadoodlist propaganda — which is all, after all, that the news really is before it is hammered into that beautiful bullshit that most people call history — and changed a few nouns and verbs and adverbs and adjectives and other parts of speech to create something entirely unbelievable and impossible but which — if inserted into the proper context would entertain, enlighten, inform, outrage, and occasionally get me nearly arrested.
But that kind of post really should be over at Uncommon Sense, where I recently included a Breaking News category for the kind of important stories in the liberal media that really are deserving of all our loathing. I expect I may actually post the pyramid story over there before the evening is done somewhere in the world.
Meanwhile, some nimrods shot up the Cape Meares lighthouse over the weekend, inflicting 50 grand in damages while exercising their second amendment rights to shoot whatever they feel like so long as they don't add to the body count, but that seems like the kind of post that should be over at Projectile Dysfunction, which I don't have ready yet, which will also celebrate insignificant penises everywhere, including mine, or in Lock and Load, my advice column currently undervelopment which tells people just like you how to put your second amendment rights to good use to make a killing during these depressing economic times. Unfortunately, Lock and Load is also unavailable at the moment.
So it turns out that I have nothing to post today, which is just as well. If I posted something, I'm betting none of you would leave any comments. Well, would you? Punks?