The missile shield is dead. Long live the war in Afghanistan!
Apparently Biraq has set up a special task force to identify any remaining policies, procedures, and executive orders put in place during the reign of error presided over by former Supreme First Idiot and Decider in Chief George Goat Boy Bush, who is still trying to discover what legacy means so he can retalierate that he really doesn’t have time to worry about it while hunting down the evil ones to make the malls safe for shopping.
Come on, idiot people, scream for me how much you don't want health care for illegal aliens. Louder. I can't hear you.
I assume today’s announcement that the Eastern European missile defense shield first proposed during the wishful One-Minute Administration of Ronald There You Go Again Ray-Gun is toast was designed in part to rachet up the noise issuing from the proudly ignorant lips of insignificant penis and snapper bearers so that the 80% of the NOMF that is not absolutely batshit insane will begin laughing so hard at the parade of well-armed wingnuts and their bloviating liberal radio talk show hosts caught on surveillance cameras that God Its-Imaginary-Self will join in and laugh these annoying idiots off the planet, once and for all.
As if that’s gonna happen. The truth is that idiots in America are like Lay’s potato chips in those old Jay Leno commercials: we’ll just make more.
The nation of miserable fucks will not back down from being a fiercely proud conglomeration of worthless well-armed amoral bipeds with limited intelligence who spend their days and nights dreaming of becoming contestants on reality and game shows where they intend to be role models to inspire for future generations. Really.
I think that to restore balance in the TV universe, we need to institute rules where all the the losers on these fucking shows have their fucking heads torn off and some randomly chosen viewer who has sent in a postcard gets to shit down the neck stump, but that's a different post. Right now, I'm trying to touch base with my kinder and gentler side.
I remember a proposal I made during the Old Rummy Ray-Gun years when Republicunts were dooming the nation to permanent debt by tripling the deficit with insane military spending, including a mobile missile system in the U.S. that would shuttle ICBMs like a thermonuclear version of three-card Monty to keep the Soviets guessing where the shit would be coming from, when the fact was the Soviet Union was already preoccupied with a total economic and political collapse precipitated by getting their asses kicked by Osama bin Laden and his buddies in Afghanistan, funded by the U.S..
Imagine that.
I suggested then that the trickle down idiots consider a bold and uncommonly sensible alternative to the blithering suggestions of Old Rummy Ray-Gun, as he searched for the letter he wrote his Alzheimer's in 1968 and misplaced. I trust that Biraq has read those proposals and is considering them now and not coming up with new less than round wheels for his mobile missile system. I wouldn't base it on Navy ships. The fucking Navy is drunker than I ever was. Don't trust those motherfuckers to get anything right.
My proposal was and is to establish a lottery where ordinary hard-working unpatriotic Americans have the opportunity to buy tickets to win the right to bear nuclear arms and store them in their homes, fully armed, ready to rock and roll toward every non-American city on the planet the next time this wonderful country is disrespected by anyone anywhere in the world.
This would deter foreign attacks because our enemies would never know which roofs in which neighborhoods hid hundreds of thousands of new, improved Hiroshima-reduxs yearning to be free.
Considering that there are 6 billion people on the planet and only 330 million potential heroes living in the U.S. — even including illegal aliens from this planet and elsewhere in the solar system — we are vastly outnumbered by our enemies to the point where if we were all suddenly transformed into highly efficient Inglorious Basterds, we’d still be doomed to annihilation, and I don't intend to go down slinging stupid arrows against those who would attempt to steal our outrageous fortune.
As an added benefit, I wrote then, such a deployment scheme would help end our dependence on foreign oil by letting ordinary citizens become public utilities, producing electricity locally for their friends, neighbors, and other assholes they don’t really care about but could profit from by an energy credit exchange.
I thought this was a good idea in the early 80s and an even better idea now, and I urge the administration to get beyond its obsession with dismantling all the crazy brutal shit the last administration bungled, unless, of course, Biraq is ready to apprehend, extradite, and have the whole bunch stand trial in The Hague and bring their executed bodies back home to hang from light poles along the nterstate system in Texas and Wyoming.
Or stake the motherfuckers to the tarmac at airports and sell tickets to watch them lose their frequent flier miles.