The Obama administration hailed a Democratic compromise on health care reform that made all uninsured Americans unpaid employees of insurance companies who can be reimbursed for out-of-pocket health care costs after the surge in Afghanistan is paid for and judged a resounding success by the liberal media.
In exchange, critics of the program have been assured that no taxpayer money will be used to fund late term abortions on male patients who are not incarcerated for capital crimes. Revisions to the bill also bar the use of stem cells that are derived from penis tissue.
The so-called public option has been replaced by a pubic option in which coverage is based upon the length of the hair in and around one's crotch. This was demanded by Christian Demopublicans who have decried the preponderance of bare pussies on their favorite search engines.