Previously on Doctor Faustroll Writes the Wrongs: The 9/11 challenge, Second amendment daily body count, poopadoodle, Tuesday after lunch, Randiness, insanity, repetition, autism, wake up calls, change, the human condition, staying on point, being for or against us, mission accomplished, mindless stupidity, the NOMF™, insignificant penises, Michael Yates, Howard Nemerov, dickweeds, teabaggers, farting, and sweet sorrow.
The following takes place between 2:35 and 2:52 PM
When I left off yesterday, I had challenged you numb-nutted miserable fucks to list ten things from among everything that 9/11 changed. They could be your ten favorite things, the most important things, the totally predictable things, your underwear, your religions, your opinions, or just ten related items offered by your duly elected officials, many of whom owe their pensions to the events of 9/11, and you are paying for those pensions and will continue to do so because you are witless wimps, so enjoy.
Granted I offered neither an incentive nor a toxic deterrent for your participation in this random targeting by imaginary forces who have few options to put on the table, assuming they could find a safe place to set up the table in the first place, and I realize that many of you are afraid to post comments because you suspect that I will either not respond at all to your feeble attempts at mental gymnastics (aiming from a bronze, are you?) or — worse — I will ask you whether your mom knows you suck or something equally profane and inappropriate. And then your health insurance won't pay for the therapy required to pick up the silly pieces of your April lives.
I was tempted not to continue this train of imaginary problem-solving when I picked up a copy of the Oregonadian this morning and realized that 80% of the stories in the terribly foreshortened first section of the paper dealt with the kind of idiocy that the NOMF has cornered the market on, but that can wait until tomorrow. There is always more idiocy to mine. Unlike forestry and other industry promoted green technology, idiocy is truly renewable and inexhaustible.
Let me point out, by the way, that only Mrs. Bitch had the shaved balls to post a comment and called you fuckwads out for the hormonally challenged citizens you are, although any of you could have posted a mere five things that 9/11 changed and earned a special place on the no fry list we imaginary terrorists maintain, for the hell of it.
I admit it was a trick challenge. September 11, 2001, changed nothing. If you managed to pull out of your ass eight or nine years ago after you calmed down, you knew that, although you were true frightened to admit. A miserable fuck is always frightened.
The NOMF still blames its karma on evil ones who hate the illusionary freedom of claiming ownership of the laws of physics. Republicans still advance their community police state approach to freedom and democracy under the cloak of free market trickle down urinomics and convincing idiots that eventually they will have so much less more government to choose from that everyone will walk around with teabags dangling from the bills of their John Deere caps and shouting NO! or YOU LIE!
Whoa! I just had such a wonderful life vision into the future when Sairhead Sirhan Palin wins the endangered Republican presidential nomination and chooses South Carolina's Joe Wilson to be her running mate, and he shouts out: "Far fuck out, Sarah! That's awesome! You're the best!"
Considering the rest of the NOMF gene pool, he ain't far off.